Close encounters of a different kind
Chapter: 01
The beginning of my conversion

I have been removed from some secular parapsychologist websites because of my so called “proselytizing” when really I just wanted to share my more unusual spiritual experiences.

So despite the very personal nature of these stories that some timed occurred while in my own sin, I have written them down to show the reality of having a personal relationship with God in Jesus Christ.

I came to a saving faith in Christ as a teenager, and then the experiences started to begin...
As a teen often objects would move off shelves in our basement and scare the daylight out of me. Doors would slam shut at times with no wind to shut them to our basement. My room was on the ground level and more than one time at night would I experience a pocking sensation from underneath my mattress, this made it difficult to sleep for me. My Christian parents would tell me I was dreaming and to try and go back to sleep.
I remember my brother and me hearing the same noises when we were alone in the house. We could hear the front door open, someone walk up the steps, go into the walk in closet in my parents room and shut the closet door.
When investigated nothing was ever disturbed, and the closet door was always open.
I am sure that many of my experiences were demonic attacks, yet many were merely soul power in nature, (or the release of kinetic energy from a developing adolescent mind).

Years later, my younger brother remembers allot of these same occurrences’, it does bring me some comfort knowing that I do not have an organic problem in my brain or something.

One evening my brother and I were eating dinner with our wives at our parents house, my brother brought up the subject of my one and only known poltergeist phenomenon I had nearly forgotten about. I say, “known” because perhaps the moving around of objects in our home as children were in fact caused by myself, but I cannot know this as fact, as I had not yet been trained in discernment concerning such matters.
The fact is that my brother had recalled me inviting him into my room to try and show him something miraculous I had just done;

I had concentrated on a plastic blow up model of a Welch’s Grape Jelly jar hanging on a nail in the corner of my room.
I concentrated on moving the object from across the room while sitting up on my bed.
All of the sudden the object jumped from its nail and hit the floor, scaring me silly!

So I yelled up to my brother and his friend, to come down and watch this new discovery in my room. As I re-hung the “Jelly Jar blowup” back on the wall, I jumped back on top my bed to give them an instant replay of what I had just moved using only my mind!
Well, my second attempt was not so miraculous; however I did manage to move it some telepathically, even though the object did not dismount from its mooring this time!

Immediately afterwards my brother asked me where the strings were to move the object? When I insisted there were no strings attached, upon close inspection my brother and his friend where amazed.

Thirty years later my brother still remembers the experience.

Needless to say; I had allot of questions about the spiritual world as a young man.
After a brief enlistment with the US Coast Guard, I would move into the City and be mentored by a Christian Minister that had a lot more “Spiritual experiences” than I had ever been taught about in the ‘conservative’ Church.

As we met together in our Bible studies, he would always teach us to pray about what he was teaching us, so that God could reveal the truth in it to us personally. We should not take these experiences only at face value.
That made perfect sense to me as we all know of the many different doctrines that exist today within various denominations.

This was the beginning of the deeper relationship I would experience in Jesus Christ. Although I cannot begin to write about all my growing experiences in this article, I will attempt to highlight some of the more unusual spiritual experiences learned.

Often the Lord would allow me to see the spiritual truths in this life by allowing me to meet people on the streets troubled or possessed by the Christian adversary, and his unclean spirits.
This was not pleasant for me, nor would I ever had perused any occult sciences’ for the sake of just learning; (so prevalently taught today by secular ‘spiritualists’ or “ghost hunters).
However, sometimes these "bag persons" would mock openly on the streets the pray full taught Bible studies offered about demons days before.  These people would mock about what we were taught demon's are and how they functioned, often to my face.
I soon discovered that these “battlefield” experiences were a useful tool in gaining knowledge of the spiritual world around us, which we all live in, whether realizing it or not!

Allow me to couch my next story and very personal experience, by telling it in a way I explained it to a Latino Soldier I met while in the Army, he had a tattoo of a crucified Christ face on his arm...You see as a young man alone in my room, I had attempted in relieving myself of my pent up sexual frustration, when suddenly out of the corner of my eye I noticed ever so briefly a ghost like image of a crucified Christ's face watching me!The Soldier with that same likeness tattooed on his arm immediately asked me; did you stop? I said, your damnded rite I did!

Below is a sketch that I did of what I saw on that day briefly out of the corner of my eye...

Also I have inverted this sketch as this shadow appeared as transparent white against the back ground of my bed room.

I believe it is important to note; that if we are genuinely born again of the Lord that we are to walk in a manner continually dependent upon him alone, and not our self-righteous flesh. When we faultier into sin (our old natures) we must repent in asking for help in our weakness.

The Lord God of Israel does not expect us to be model saints all the time; he expects us to be honest and dependant in our RELATIONSHIP with him alone.

When we continue for some time to walk continually being regernerated, sanctified, we are transformed by the Holy Spirit, and not of our own efforts, into being more Christ like.

In fact we cannot make ourselves be more Godly at all, as this is not our work in the natural to try and fulfill what so ever!

If we try and fulfill the law independent or (on our own accord) we become like Pharoses, the very people Jesus fault with the most! No, it is us who are to be dependent upon Christ in our daily walk, rather than attempting to make ourselves good in independence. Submission to the Holy Spirit of God is the key in our weakness, in continually confessing our great need for forgiveness found in the atonement of Christ upon the Cross!

Unfortunatly allot of very bad Bible instruction, has deluded people over the centuries to fall into this trap and snare of the devil.

The opposite of submission is rebellion; and the opposite of dependence is independence: so we cannot make ourselves good period.

We must walk in FAITH, which he who has started a good work in us; will complete it in us in the end. It is us who continually has need of Jesus Christ alone; he does not need us to complete his work in us. It is because of pride that most people try and appear as "good Christian people", and it is the accuser of the Brethren (the Devil) which say look at this one's sin in life they cannot know Christ! This is a trick of the devil, causing people who have their heart's right with God to stumble and fall; seeing the impossibility in their lives, in walking righteously before God. This is precisly the very reason that Jesus Christ came to begin with; to deliver us from the clutches of sin in our lives. It has nothing to do at all with our own efforts; except for the fact we realize that we truly need Jesus Christ for spiritual life. No other way exists upon heaven or earth, this is why the Apostle Paul rights (paraphrased) "what shall we then say, that we started with Christ, but we end of ourselves and our own efforts?' Certainly not we start with a dependency on Christ and also end with it!

Another experience I encountered as a young man was the ability to see ores (SP) halo’s around certain peoples heads. Maybe it was just oversensitive eyes, or maybe it was what was once was painted around religious’ saint's heads who knows.

This "halo" often appeared to my in either a light green or purple light what I like to call the Easter colors; green meaning life and purple meaning royalty. This had a personal appeal to me making me feel closer to our Lord...

Stupid, sensationalism, maybe but our Lord knows how to touch every one of us in a very personal way, not always shared with anyone else.

Another example is a butterfly; to me this is a glorified body of a being that has crawled upon the earth, (symbolizing man before he receives his glorified body with the Lord). I remember hearing an old Christian poem about worms crawling the earth, well this is the same idea. Ridiculous maybe for another, but I would see butterflies everywhere it seemed, and then I even received pillow cases and sheets with butterflies on them as gifts from my mother. This may seem too feminine for a man but it is all in your perspective.

Try telling me Steve McQueen in Papyon was a feminine movie?

My point is, if ones heart is open enough to receive personal revelations from our Lord, there is no set rule on how he can communicate too you, but it will always be in a Biblical way.

I imagine there are many people that have experienced unusual spiritual events in their lives, but will not publish them openly as they are afraid of repercussions’ from their community.

I could share some spiritual events from others, but than that would be a breach of trust, so I will stick to my own stories with the hope they will bring people who are searching for answers in their lives spiritually, to the reality of having a living relationship with Jesus Christ. I would also like to add that a good Exorcist must be able to distinguish what spiritual forces he is dealing with.

The spiritual world is a real place, and it is really no place for an amateur or someone who believes that they are doing scientific research. They are Kingdoms that are not of this physical world, and deception is often apart of this world.

Perhaps I am a little bit more receptive than some others in seeing these types of occurrences, but I also know that I am nearly not as perceptive as some others I have known.

Unfortunately, within the modern day respected Seminaries, often this type of spiritual contact (even when praying in Christ's name) are dismissed as “not the norm” or some type of misguided Bible teachings steeped in “charismatic emotionalism” with no real root in Biblical truth. Nonsense, for if you read about the Apostles experiences, and look around at these phenomenon's experienced today you will find that this world has never changed, but is as consistent as ever. Only the deceptions change as mankind becomes more knowledgeable of the world around him.

To my way of thinking this is most unfortunate for the Church, because the Clergy are not open to a deeper understanding of the workings of the Holy Spirit and in knowing His enemy.
Intellectual understanding has never been able to replace a working and deeper relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ, and it should never attempt to, as then men are playing within the enemies encampment.

I am not saying that studying the word of God or other written material is a bad thing, just that it has never and will never replace our personal relationship with our Bridegroom currently in heaven.

Can you imagine only studying your spouse? Or in attempting to know them, when you believed only a certain amount of intimacy was permissible? To me, that would be a relationship I would only marginally pursue, And in my opinion that is exactly what many people do.

Most often an experience within the spiritual realm is defined by the “Church” as demonic, or an emotional hype or even a mental dysfunction. This again only shows me a lack of understanding concerning the spiritual realm, an area that a Pastor is charged by God in understanding! This is not to say that many events could in fact be organic dysfunction's in their origin; however they are often dismissed as such with no knowledge, or an investigation of the person or their origin.

It is my personal belief that many Christian Clergymen produced from Seminaries are ill equipped in their understanding of the human soul and spirit, (with many of them not knowing the difference) yet these very men are charged by God in caring for the needs of their flocks souls and spiritual well being. It has been my observation that these events are dismissed, medicated, or even overreacted to, causing deeper personal turmoil because of the lack of spiritual discernment, training or teachings within a given Church.

How sad this is to me as being a minister of the Gospel has much more responsibility than just preaching the Word, or even in directing people in how to live. A Pastor is a position of Spiritual leadership, in knowing 'the way' yet the natural world is looking elsewhere for their spiritual directions, as they see the emptiness in many of so-called Clergy.
I am not a doctor or an academic, and my Clergy credentials were hard earned through my service on the streets, and not inside a Seminary, yet I see a great need for Pastors that have a thorough understanding of the spiritual realm they claim to represent.

I am not a "Christian Apologetic" to the secular world, yet they often lend an ear to me when the “Church” often refuses too.

Does it ever seem to you the visible Church has become just another business organization, appointing and dismissing who they choose? The Christian Church was never intended to function in this way, it was to be a deeply personal experience involving the Church and their Christ. How many have been marginalized or even killed throughout history for even attempting to make such a statement?

Millions of people is the answer, especially when given no government protection.

How fortunate we are to live in the United States of America, yet Christians should rethink just who they are worshipping.

Is it their respective institutions, or is it the living God?

Close encounters of a different kind
Chapter: 02
Communicating with our Lord

I believe that the single most important thing learned in my Christian life is in discerning when the Lord is speaking too me.

Not even intellectual or Biblical head knowledge is important in this area.
One must be still in prayer waiting on the Lord. The Lord does not speak to us on demand; he speaks to us as we find a quiet place for Him in our soul. Our human spirit must be regenerated by our acceptance of what Jesus Christ has done for us on the cross in dying for our sins. At that point in our lives, the Holy Spirit of God in Christ restores the broken connection between our human spirit and his Holy Spirit making a two way communication possible.  Before the fall of mankind (as written about in the book of Genesis) man could still communicate directly with God. This is why Christ is often referred to as the second Adam; as through His blood atonement, we are able again to have fellowship with our heavenly Father.

This communication testimony may not seem as miraculous as others I have written about, but it is the foundation of the Christian life!

Hearing from our Lord as a Christian should be a normal occurrence, although we may not be mature enough to be able to discern it.
Providentially, the Lord is working in our life with all its details everyday, although we often cannot see it.

This is why historically the great Priest Martin Luther, of the reformation said that the righteous (in Christ) shall live by faith, and not by sight, or sacraments as being taught in that day.

As Christians we should know it is possible for a two way communication with our Lord!
Of course the High Priests’ throughout history have never wanted this to be known by the masses, for it would limit the need and control by them! But God, wants us to have a personal relationship with him in order to find our freedom. 

God has provided us with our own High Priest, found in the person of Jesus Christ.

We are to confess our sins and shortfalls to Him only, as He is the one mediator between heaven and earth! Even the Protestant Church has its roots within the Roman Catholic Church, and many of its traditions and Biblical views are still rooted within this religious structure. I intend no disrespect to these institutions of the brethren; however it is only through Jesus Christ that we are able to communicate with the living God, and not by doctrinal teachings. If that were the case, only the most religious and intellectual gifted people could have a relationship with the living God of the Bible!
But wait; God uses the foolish ones of this world to confound the wise!
He always has and always will: who else would have picked a bunch of Fishermen or Farmers to do his work?

If you think about it, who were most opposed to the prophets, Jesus Christ, and even Martin Luther?
The Religious establishments’ of their time, that's who!

You see if you are free in Christ you are free indeed.

With that being said, I will now move forward in how I have learned to discern the Lords voice and leanings in my life.

The most normal of our Lords one way communication too us is in His Providence.

I can remember taking an interest in the meanings of peoples names, so I started praying about my own.

One day I felt the Lord moving me to simply take a walk, so I did.
I came upon a Young man I had not seen in a while, I spoke to him about an issue he was involved in that I felt was dangerous in his life, he was shocked and in awe about what I had spoken to him about. A bit later continuing to walk through the city, I met a young black man about my age; he had been praying about a particular issue and was unable to resolve it. I don't remember the issue, but he was overjoyed after we had spoken and returned home.

As I sat underneath the civil war statue we had been talking under, I looked up to see a Soldier with an Angel of protection over his head. The name under the statue read Roland Park Dell. Boom, that personal revelation hit me like a ton of bricks!
You see my name is Roland Dell, and a few years later I would join the Army and do twenty years before becoming disabled.

This is also an example of how our Lord will always speak to us in using Biblical texts; (examples found in the Bible).

Decades later my new bride and I would do a Bible study together on Gideon, at a cabin on my birthday in the woods.
The Bible story tells us that Gideon was the least of his household among the Israelites?
God sent an Angel too him exclaiming “brave Soldier, get up and lead your people” Gideon knew he was the least in the land, yet God had chosen him to exhibit His deliverance of the people.
Again, this is an example of God using the least or foolish ones of the land used to confound the wise, thus bringing glory to God and not man.

The beginning of discerning His voice...

First off, the Lords voice in ones life will never be contrary to the word of God in writing; The Bible. The Bible must always be studied and applied within its proper contexts. This takes much prayer and studding by either ourselves or other more mature Christians that we should be learning from.

However, our intellectual understanding of the Bible does not limit our Lord in communicating with us, it only limits our understanding of how He chooses to work, and not work! Their have been many a crazy out their swearing that they have herd from God! We all are familiar with some loon killing the innocent and saying that “God” told them to do it. This is a prime example of what the Bible forbids and calls murder.

The Bible teaches us that we must “test the spirits” in whom is directing us.
Is it our own thoughts we are discerning, is it the accuser of the brethren (Satan, who also knows his Bible very well) is their confusion present, or is their a perfect peace that we know is rite, and most moral in our souls?
I will use the analogy of a faint radio signal being received by a receiver (the Christians conscience); does it square with what our Lord would do? Does it not square, does it change, and is it confusing?
Our minds can change continually and confusion is not of God. Guess what, you cannot force the Lord to speak too you either.
So why do I write all this? It is because through our spiritual growth, (sanctification) which often takes some time, we can start to discern when the Lord is speaking too us, and when he is not.
My writings are not intended to be some crash course in how we can discern when our Lord is speaking too us, I write these things so that you can know it is indeed possible, in His timing.
Many of our foremost Biblical scholars will tell you this is not so, because they have never been taught or experienced any difference!
Do not worry if this seems impossible or like some sort of head game to you, simply continue to live in a quiet faith and in time the Lord may reveal himself to you when you are ready. Believe in faith, and eventually it will be opened to you personally.






Close encounters of a different kind
Chapter: 03
Seeing Jesus Christ in my life

I was raised in a fundamental faith and (very conservative) Church, I do not consider myself Pentecostal nor Charismatic, neither do I consider myself to be a legalist or moralist in my walk with our Lord.

Yet if we walk in the Spirit, we cannot fulfill the lusts of the flesh, and vise versa.
It is a continual battle but the battle is really not ours, it is the Lords.
Our job is to continually confess our weakness and sin in our fallen nature.
Somehow people have gotten the idea that we must walk as “holy Joe's” to gain acceptance by our Lord. This is what the Pharisees tried to do, and force others to do in the time of Christ.
It is an age old struggle, but was it not King David that constantly confessed his sin to the Lord, yes and God considered him a man after His own heart.
Why, not because he never lived in sin, but because he constantly confessed it too the Lord asking forgiveness and strength, this is what we all need to do!

The God of the Bible is a God of compassion and mercy; all we need to do is confess our need for Him. This is why the God of Abraham sent the one promised for thousands of years to the Jews, he was the Christ the chosen one given to take away the sins of not only the Jews but the world if only we will believe in faith.

It had been about twenty years since I left the City and moved to the Eastern shore.
I was very lonely, not always behaving myself perfectly but I was attempting to live by faith. I was a Soldier now working on the waterfront as a marine engineer.
The quietness of Kent Island would soon be disappearing due to an influx of the middle-class migrating to new homes on the Eastern Shore.

Of course me like many others tried to escape this mass migration years prior to it happening, but than you cannot stop progress as someone said.
Anyway just before this housing boom took place, I would ask this woman out I knew in the Army Reserves. I told God to forgive me for asking out a nonbeliever in the faith, but chastised him for not providing me with anyone for all my years, (I was 38 years old).
God must have been laughing at me, because once again he blasted away any concepts I had about the “proper Christian life” and gave me exactly what I needed.
For over a year I painstakingly kept a journal of my dating relationship with this woman.
I kept this book partly out of paranoia, and the other half in trying to keep myself accountable for my actions before God, that I would like to add hardly helped me at all.

I also started attending Church meetings again, trying to keep myself on the straight and narrow, and constantly prayed for my girlfriends salvation.
I had a flashback of nearly drowning in the surf years earlier as I prayed for her.
The Lord showed me at that moment that all I could do was to hold out the provision of salvation to her; (like the life guards held out the life ring to me that day caught in the rip) it was up to her to take that provision for life.

I also remember the Lord telling me to end the relationship, I cried like a baby because this time I was really in love, but in obedience like Abraham I decided to stop seeing her after Church that day, this was the hardest thing the Lord had ever asked me to do.

In Church praying the Pastor spoke about the first born belonging to the Lord.
A vision of a beautifully sharpened sword pierced my soul (fatty tissue) water ran from it as I burst into tears. Embarrassed I wiped my eyes sitting up in my leather jacket and tried to escape the eyes of the deacons reassuring me at my side.
The next thing that happened was even worse for me...
As the Pastor continued to preach he then told of the double edged sword being sharp enough to separate bone from tissue, all at once another vision appeared to me in prayer but this time the sword completely laid open my soul. Water poured out unstoppably from my opened soul, and again physically I burst into tears in Church, but this time everybody noticed it.

Two months into our relationship my girlfriend came into a personal relationship with Jesus Christ; these experiences I had were to test me like Abraham, seeing if I would put God above my own desires. The sword cutting into my flesh, I believe was because I was a type of Christ to my future Wife, taking on her sins as my own before she knew the Lord. I will not go in to my personal journal that I kept for nearly a year, but at least every three days the Lord would speak to my heart in word and in situations far beyond anything that could have ever been written in fiction.
These events changed forever my understanding of the personal relationship we can have in Christ. When I finally asked for her hand in marriage, these miraculous events slowed to nearly a stand still, and it was back to simply living by faith.





Close encounters of a different kind
Chapter: 04
Receiving my calling

My new Bride and I were the first Married in the new Presbyterian (PCA) Church on the Island. We struggled through our membership class, because we were so worried about impressing them that we nearly botched the whole deal in giving our testimonies’ of when we came into a relationship with Jesus Christ, my faience was so nervous she nearly acted as if she did not know what they were talking about, until I intervened and explained to them she had been searching in her life for a long time before her salvation.

The Elders burst in congratulating me as being instrumental in her salvation.
We were married on February 5 Labor Day weekend, as we could not find another opening at the Church for over another year, and I knew we must wed as soon as possible.

I many times approached our Pastor as I did with many before him seeking direction for my calling in life. Another Pastor nearly kicked me out of his office as I explained to him about the miraculous events that had shaped my life of faith. He did not believe one could go one on one with the Lord as I had testified too him. As I drove away in my old pickup truck, I was so hurt by his response that I asked God how he could use someone that did not even believe he could receive an answer from Him in prayer.
The Lord told me simply; “I use who I can”.
Our Pastor was a little different however; he listened to me intently and said he did not see me as a Pastor, but maybe a Chaplain as I was in the Army... So I thanked him and left. The Army said that I was too old to start in another career, so I left it at that.

One evening about a year after our marriage we were lying in bed together.
The adventures man that I am, I decided to pray before having sex...
Well, the Lords response to me was to give me a “Technicolor Vision” of a heart beating filled with rich green grass, and I was not intoxicated!
I told my wife about it asking her what she thought it might mean, she said “I have no idea!
The next morning while warming up my car at our old farm house, Truth for Life was on my car radio just before leaving for work.

Pastor Alistair Beg was explaining about his father as a shepherd in Scotland.
He explained that the word Pastor is derived from the word Pasture, and it is Only God who gives a man a “Pastors Heart”! As I sat their receiving an answer to my vision the night before, I remember seeing the shadow of a man sitting next to me out of the corner of my eye. This is only significant to me now, because I can remember seeing this same shadow shoulder to shoulder next to me as I was dying years later that ended my Army career and catapulted me into giving my Christian testimony.

Always on my right, Jesus has continually been with me even in death.
He will never leave or forsake you, for if you truly believe on him than you belong to him and not even the US Military has a claim on you like that!

May the Lord bless your understanding of what I have written here today?
To his glory in Christ's name I pray, Amen.

LIGHTSHIP MINISTRIES “Vessels of Light for Christ”

Please Note: This page is still under construction, please excuse grammatical and spelling errors.

I posted this page not as a scholar, but rather to share with others the reality of knowing Jesus Christ; meeting us in our needs.